......three days later, I give up and call the Enterprise main customer line......
Phone bring, bring!
Customer Assistant: (chirping) Blah Blah Blah Welcome to the Wonderful World of Enterprise Rent-A-Car! How can I help you?
Me: (to Bear) God DAMN it. It's another machine.
Customer Assistant: Hah Ha Ha! No, this is Blah Blah Blah from Enterprise Rent a Car! How can I help you today, ma'am?
Me: (sighing) I live in Nova Scotia, Canada. In July, I want to fly to Rochester, New York. Once there, I will be renting a car to drive around New York State and I will be spending a few days in Niagara Falls. Now, the website says that individual offices may allow cars to go over the border. I need to know if I can take the car over the border to Niagara Falls. Niagara Falls, Canada.
Customer Assistant: Do you have any idea what size car you'll be needing, ma'am?
Me: (warily) Why? Does that matter?*
Customer Assistant: No, not to answer your question, ma'am. I can just check and see if any cars are available on the days in question for you.
Me: No. Thanks. I'll do that later.
Customer Assistant: (reading aloud) Now it says here that you are allowed to drive cars into neighboring states, ma'am. So I would say that wouldn't be a problem. Ma'am?
Me: DON'T MA'AM ME. Please. And um...I live in Canada, and Canada? Isn't a state.
Customer Assistant: Ma'a...excuse me?
Me: Canada isn't a state. So the statement that cars are allowed into neighboring states might not apply.
Customer Assistant: ........um? .........Hmm.
Me: Can you please dial the Rochester Airport kiosk directly for me?
Customer Assistant: (glad to be rid of the rude Canadian) SURE!
Phone (bring, bring)
Customer Assistant #2's voice: This is the Rochester Airport's Enterprise Rent-A-Car location. We are open from 7:30 to midnight. If you'd like to leave a message,
Me: (to Bear) God DAMN it.
*Actually, the 'size matters over the border' thing cropped up when I was moving here. You can't take the comfy, easy to drive Uhauls that look like little vans over the border. Nuh-uh. You must have the huge, who's-your-daddy-now? mongo 18 foot trucks.